LOVE ABBY: I clear up my closet and have determined to promote my wedding ceremony costume from 21 years in the past. I really like the costume; it’s great. However it’s a really massive field to maintain. My 16 yr outdated daughter made it clear to me that she would by no means marry. It was exhausting for me to just accept as she is my solely daughter.
The factor is, she needs to strive my costume on. I do not need her to do it as a result of she would not agree with the sanctity of marriage or the duty in it, and I do not need my wedding ceremony costume to be tried on by somebody who thinks that means about marriage. It means extra than simply enjoying dress-up, and I consider it ought to solely be worn by somebody who will respect it.
Am I flawed? Does my daughter have a proper to really feel damage about it? – NO DRESSING GAME
DEAR NOT: You are not flawed. However in case you’re attempting to impose your values in your teenage daughter, I severely doubt it’s going to work. I want you talked about why your daughter feels the way in which she does. Did you ask her that query? Moderately than arguing about whether or not she has the appropriate to place in your wedding ceremony costume, a dialogue about what she thinks it symbolizes for you – and what attempting it on means to her – is perhaps extra productive.
PS Since you might be operating out of space for storing, give the costume to a future bride whose conventional values mirror your individual.
LOVE ABBY: I drive a classic automotive to work on a building website on daily basis. Since I began working there this summer season, I have been requested rather a lot about gross sales. More often than not I take it as a praise and inform them it isn’t at present on the market, however the identical folks usually preserve asking.
It is getting on my nerves. I’ve even seen folks attempt to open the hood to see the engine whereas I am out and about within the distance. I perceive that individuals who ask about it embody proudly owning an outdated car, however I haven’t got one other automotive or mode of transport and I am beginning to get fearful. Any recommendation can be significantly appreciated. – ON EDGE IN GEORGIA
LOVE ON THE EDGE: Inform the perpetrators (once more) that your automotive will not be on the market AND you do not need anybody to the touch it. If it continues, inform your supervisor or boss that you could be be involved in regards to the security of your car if somebody tries to get in “from a distance”. In case your automotive is broken, you may be legally liable. Nevertheless, in case you nonetheless really feel uncomfortable afterward, change jobs.
LOVE ABBY: I’ve issues with emotions that I most likely should not have for somebody. She at all times walks round in her underwear once I come by. I prefer it after all, however I am undecided if it ought to annoy me or if I ought to act on it. – CONFUSED IN THE EAST
DEAR CONFUSED: A constructive message from the #MeToo motion was that when doubtful, COMMUNICATE to be able to keep away from unlucky misunderstandings. In that case, it will be applicable to ask this girl why she is strolling round bare when you’re there as a result of you aren’t certain easy methods to interpret the message she is sending. DO NOT ACTION IF YOUR ANSWER IS THAT IT WOULD BE WELCOME.
Pricey Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and based by her mom Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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